Monday, December 24, 2007

Merry Christmas From Me And Robert!

Hello blogger friends! On behalf of myself and Robert* I'm wishing all of you and your families a very Merry Christmas and a Blessed New Year! And while I have your attention I'd like to share with you a little Christmas humor from my hometown newspaper. The paper ran a contest called Cracked Carols where folks had to write their own version of popular Christmas carols. Most of the winners wrote about purely local issues but one Cracked Carol has mass appeal. Everyone can relate to it. It's titled, "Dangerous Toys" and it's sung to "My Favorite Things" you know, that song from "The Sound of Music". I know, it's not technically a Christmas carol but, as my paper said, deal with it!

Dangerous Toys

Magnets in Batman
that lodge in tots' tummies.
Drug-covered dots
that the kids think are yummy.
Thomas the Train
with lead paint that destroys.
These are a few
of the dangerous toys.

Curious George
with that smile so beguiling.
Once in kid's mouths
quick for help you'll be dialing.
Easy Bake Ovens that burn and annoy.
These are a few
of the dangerous toys.

When the beads pop,
when the paint peels;
batteries go bad.
We hear of the recall
of dangerous toys
and realize that we've been had.

Chinese toy makers
keep cutting their corners.
For US exports
they ship past our borders.
Into the hands
of our own girls and boys.
Who can't tell the safe
from the dangerous toys.

Parents are tense
as the holidays beckon.
Will government watchdogs
help out, do you reckon?
Or will they fail
to detect and destroy
incoming shipments
of dangerous toys?

When the beads pop,
when the paint peels;
batteries go bad.
We hear of the recall
of dangerous toys
and realize we've been had.

Isn't that funny? I laughed out loud when I first read it. I mean, it's so true. Every parent and every child has had to deal, in one way or another, with toys that disappoint, don't work or are downright dangerous. To put that universal experience to such a classic song was brilliant, in my book. I hope all of you enjoyed this little ditty as much as I did. Again, Merry Christmas and a Blessed New Year everybody!!

*Robert is my friend over at the blog Tired Of All The Liberal Rhetoric Out There; he is elwoodin in my link field. He's a guest columnist on my blog and I'm a guest columnist on his. My latest guest post is on Robert's blog now, if you want to have a look see.


Tapline said...

Merry Christmas to you and yours...and a very prosperous New Year.....stay well....

WomanHonorThyself said...

hey u!..happy ho ho ho get back to celebrating!..heh:)

mccommas said...

Merry Christmas!

I can still say that right?

heidianne jackson said...

merry christmas and happy new year to both of you!

and i will remind you that we all (at least we old ones) played with things that are now considered very dangerous and we mostly survived. but i DID love this!

JMK said...

A belated Merry Christmas....I worked Sunday night the 23rd and the 24th day, was home with family on the 24th night (that was great) and I worked Christmas day and night.

I visited family yesterday and am just catching up with things today...I'm working tomorrow (Friday) day and night as well.

heidianne jackson said...

happy new year, dwana! and to robert, too. may all be better in 2008 .